Wednesday, September 3, 2008

May 2007 - I'm FINE

So this wont be my greatest work as it's now midnight and I really should be in bed. I've had a ton of people ask lately how we have been doing and haven't gotten a chance to write each of you back so I'm blogging to update and inform everyone in one big giant swoop.

We are doing FINE. Don't you just hate it when people say that?? As far as the chilluns go, they are awesome. They make me laugh daily and are all smart, beautiful, and so happy. They are also very well-fed and eating us out of house and home! It has been so much fun to see their dynamics and how they interact with each other and their different character traits. Addison is definately a strong-willed little girl. She will never be the shy little wildflower that her mother was! Yes, I did say WAS. 11 years of marriage to one such as T will bring you out of your shell a bit...

Some of you have also asked about how Laken is doing. She is doing o.k. Mike's mom & dad are taking excellent care of her and she was given permission to remain at her previous school which was good for her. She still has a ways to go but that is expected. She loves T and really latches on to him when we are together. The boys miss getting to play with her every weekend, as they live about 30 min. away now.

I feel like I should say something about Mike - since I devoted a whole blog earlier to Danica. Mike was unlike anyone you have probably ever met. He was completely kind-hearted. But also as stubborn as a mule and would argue about the color of grass if the mood hit him. He loved his wife, and he loved his daughter. And he loved his friends and knew exactly how to make you laugh when you needed it. His colorful, redneck language will stay burned in all our minds and will always be thought about with a smile. And he loved God. He had a picture of Christ in Heaven across the back glass of his new truck. And across the front a cross with the words "It's not mine, it's His" Mike lived his faith everyday. I don't know if they have mud-boggin in Heaven, but if they do - he's right there! He is definitely missed, but he is with his wife and with his savior so it's hard to be sad for his sake as that is exactly where he wanted to be.

In terms of my marriage, my husband is still the best gift God ever gave me. I have said before, that I feel like my children just kind of come along as part of me, but to think that T was hand-picked by the creator of the universe just for ME, leaves me in awe. I have to say, the last few months have not been our greatest moments, but we are still staying strong. Mike's death completely devastated him and he is still grieving for what was lost in his one true brother. In that loss, I couldn't relate. I couldn't comfort him. I couldn't replace his lost friendship. And so I grieved the lost of MY best friend. I'm only writing all this to let you know that it is so easy to come off to the world as having a perfect marriage. The difference is, we were able to find our way back to what we were. Changed, but still the same. Even with the pain we were going through, we still both had Christ. And in Him, we both knew we had no option but to see each other through His eyes and not our own tear-stained ones. We could have opted out, it would have been very easy... and almost understandable under such stress. But instead, we are clawing our way back. So when I say we are FINE. We are. I am nothing without the man who gives me chills every time I see him on stage singing, who makes me smile every time I see him out in front playing football with the boys, who makes me tear when I see him rocking our baby in the darkness. I am just thankful to God that we were able to make our foundation strong so that when the storms came, our house didn't crumble.

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