that little thermometer on the side.... Yeah, it appears to be stuck. Our chip-in account, also stuck. But no - we are pretty much just hanging around.
Unfortunately, a good amount of the money we had been saving the last few weeks just went out the door to our homestudy agency to finish up our homestudy and pay the travel expenses for our social worker. A mere $500 more than we had estimated. So we are back to needing $5000 to have our money to submit our dossier when the timing is ready.
And that's kind of been stuck too. We 'thought' we were done with our homestudy. Finally. But it needed a small wording change. So then we 'thought' we were done with our homestudy. But then they found out our background checks had expired after only 6 months. So we again submitted the permission forms and an extra fee and are now in a holding pattern again. Until we 'think' we have a finalized homestudy that we can submit to Charleston to try to get our government permission paper - that coveted i-171h form that I think can take from 30-90 days to receive.
And by then, we are hoping, no - praying, no - trusting - that God will have provided our needs for the remaining $5000 to submit our dossier. Cause it stinks being stuck.
**as an aside, in case you were wondering: since we didn't sell the house, why not a home equity loan? We checked into that too - with our $20,000 equity. They could only approve a loan of $5000. Which is too low for a home equity loan to be drawn up. Go figure, and here we 'thought' home equity loan meant the equity on your home?
** as another aside, I can completely see how pork projects get through Congress. A.K.A. bribes for votes. With this health care bill that may truly bankrupt our country and increase all our taxes, and increase our insurance rates to the astronomic proportions - also came an extension on the Adoption Tax Credit which was set to expire in 2010. It also increased the amount refunded to a little over $13,000. Which is awesome!! I just hate the $3,546,035 I'll have to pay in taxes/insurance to be able to get that $13,000 refund.
** and as if 2 asides were just not enough - Ethiopia courts just posted a sign saying the 'two-trip' rule for parents to attend court was suspended indefinitely. But our agency is still recommending planning for 2 trips just in case they change back. And thaaaaaat's all folks!
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Monday, March 22, 2010
Best Place Ever
Braeden has been begging me to go eat Ethiopian food since oh... last February when I got back from my trip. He prides himself on being able to "eat anything I make". And that's a good thing. As in, my little trooper will actually eat fish, spinach, and mushrooms like his mommy - AND like them.
So on a trip back to NC to celebrate his birthday, we made a detour through downtown Charlotte to go to Meskerem - one of only 2 Ethiopian restaurants close enough for us to visit. Little sister was also with us but with her picky palate, I opted for the PB&J before we left the house.
SO - the progression of the most perfect date with my son - with a little chaperone named Addi:
Waiting for a table having nice chit-chat around the traditional Ethiopian serving platter.
Yummy food arrives. We are so stoked. The bread under it (injera) is what you use to pick it up. We had beef tibs, spicy beef (in the middle), really, really good collard greens, and bean sides (the yellow and orange on the left). 
You just use a piece of your injera to pick up a piece of meat or a little veggie, and pop it in. Even a kid can do it!!
You KNOW I'm not going to eat that!
My favorite (and his) - the beef tibs.
Oh, sweet Meskerem, we think we love you. We put a hurtin on that plate o' goodness. But just couldn't make it to the finish line.
Braeden's review: "that was the BEST PLACE EVER!!!"
So on a trip back to NC to celebrate his birthday, we made a detour through downtown Charlotte to go to Meskerem - one of only 2 Ethiopian restaurants close enough for us to visit. Little sister was also with us but with her picky palate, I opted for the PB&J before we left the house.
SO - the progression of the most perfect date with my son - with a little chaperone named Addi:
Waiting for a table having nice chit-chat around the traditional Ethiopian serving platter.
Yummy food arrives. We are so stoked. The bread under it (injera) is what you use to pick it up. We had beef tibs, spicy beef (in the middle), really, really good collard greens, and bean sides (the yellow and orange on the left). 
You just use a piece of your injera to pick up a piece of meat or a little veggie, and pop it in. Even a kid can do it!!
You KNOW I'm not going to eat that!
My favorite (and his) - the beef tibs.
Oh, sweet Meskerem, we think we love you. We put a hurtin on that plate o' goodness. But just couldn't make it to the finish line.Braeden's review: "that was the BEST PLACE EVER!!!"
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Change is a happenin'
I'm emotionally and physically worn out. For the last two days I have purged our house of every toy or child item that hasn't been touched in 2 weeks and man did it feel good. Or not. "I'm too old for this" my back is screaming. In reality - our local consignment sale is next week and for the first time ever, I'm actually working on it earlier than the night before. Go me.
In today's news: Ethiopia has now decided to make their adoption process a two-tripper. Some other countries have had this in place for some time but we were getting out easy. When we started last year the process was - you wait forever, you get your kiddos picture and history, a month or so later you went to court and prayed to pass, if you passed, you would get to travel a month or so later to pick up said kiddo.
Then last month, after CBS came out with a 2 min. expose on corrupt Ethiopian adoptions (based on an Australian puff peace which has already been investigated and found to be seriously flawed), and idiot Americans tried to smuggle Haitian babies across country lines (seriously, were they not thinking at all???) ---- the US Embassy started doing long investigations before issuing exit visas. And they started limiting appts. to 10 per month, per agency. So you pass court - then wait 2-3 months before being able to get an appt. to pick up your kiddo. And seriously, I understand the investigation aspect and agree it is a good thing to make sure children aren't being stolen from their parents. But why not before you are the legal parents of that child??? Wouldn't that be the best time to make sure the adoption is legit??
So after today: you wait forever, you get your child's picture and history, a month or so later, both parents have to travel to Ethiopia to attend court and verify that yes, they do want to love and care for this child. Then, you travel home, without your baby ..... and wait 2-3 months for the US Embassy to decide that yes, the adoption is legit and you can go back and get the child.
The upside - we will get to see Olivia, hold Olivia, kiss Olivia about 3-4 months earlier than we would have otherwise. Which is awesome. Another upside is that it looks like because we will have seen our child before court, it allows you to come home on another type of Visa. One which will make her officially a US citizen upon entrance to the country. Which means we will not have to go through the long process of paying to have her re-adopted. Which was a whole other paperwork hassle after you get home.
The downside - coming home without her. And knowing that she is in an orphanage. Being cared for by other women. Without you. That sucks. Another downside - the $4-5000 extra that a second trip will require. That sucks too. (Sorry for the language but there is just no other way to explain how I feel about it.)
BUT - that's a lot of change going on in 6 months. So who knows what the next year will hold as we wait? And while I stress about not having the money.... how are we going to get the money.... having to leave her behind after seeing her.... I read these passages this morning:
Psalm 20:4-5 "May he give you the desire of your heart. May he make all your plans succeed. We will shout for joy when you are victorious and will lift up our banners in the name of our God. May the Lord grant all your requests."
If God can design drops of rain into a rainbow, and the changing color of the leaves - I'm sure He's got this under control too.
In today's news: Ethiopia has now decided to make their adoption process a two-tripper. Some other countries have had this in place for some time but we were getting out easy. When we started last year the process was - you wait forever, you get your kiddos picture and history, a month or so later you went to court and prayed to pass, if you passed, you would get to travel a month or so later to pick up said kiddo.
Then last month, after CBS came out with a 2 min. expose on corrupt Ethiopian adoptions (based on an Australian puff peace which has already been investigated and found to be seriously flawed), and idiot Americans tried to smuggle Haitian babies across country lines (seriously, were they not thinking at all???) ---- the US Embassy started doing long investigations before issuing exit visas. And they started limiting appts. to 10 per month, per agency. So you pass court - then wait 2-3 months before being able to get an appt. to pick up your kiddo. And seriously, I understand the investigation aspect and agree it is a good thing to make sure children aren't being stolen from their parents. But why not before you are the legal parents of that child??? Wouldn't that be the best time to make sure the adoption is legit??
So after today: you wait forever, you get your child's picture and history, a month or so later, both parents have to travel to Ethiopia to attend court and verify that yes, they do want to love and care for this child. Then, you travel home, without your baby ..... and wait 2-3 months for the US Embassy to decide that yes, the adoption is legit and you can go back and get the child.
The upside - we will get to see Olivia, hold Olivia, kiss Olivia about 3-4 months earlier than we would have otherwise. Which is awesome. Another upside is that it looks like because we will have seen our child before court, it allows you to come home on another type of Visa. One which will make her officially a US citizen upon entrance to the country. Which means we will not have to go through the long process of paying to have her re-adopted. Which was a whole other paperwork hassle after you get home.
The downside - coming home without her. And knowing that she is in an orphanage. Being cared for by other women. Without you. That sucks. Another downside - the $4-5000 extra that a second trip will require. That sucks too. (Sorry for the language but there is just no other way to explain how I feel about it.)
BUT - that's a lot of change going on in 6 months. So who knows what the next year will hold as we wait? And while I stress about not having the money.... how are we going to get the money.... having to leave her behind after seeing her.... I read these passages this morning:
Psalm 20:4-5 "May he give you the desire of your heart. May he make all your plans succeed. We will shout for joy when you are victorious and will lift up our banners in the name of our God. May the Lord grant all your requests."
If God can design drops of rain into a rainbow, and the changing color of the leaves - I'm sure He's got this under control too.
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Confessions of a Blogaholic
I confess, I am addicted to adoption blogs. Just being able to follow families from the paperwork chase, to submission of their dossier (oh, dance of joy...), to referral of that sweet baby's face, to travel and home - it is addicting. And I spend way too much time that should be devoted to laundry salivating over little round faces with great big eyes.
And while we are in the mood to confess (or me anyway) - after a Sunday School lesson this past week, I need to confess to all my peeps - I have no mercy. Or very little. It's sad really. Feel free to stop following me at this point.
We did a spiritual gifts survey to which my score in the mercy column, let's just say, it's less than the number of fingers I have. Almost on one hand. As a Compassion advocate, I should probably be fired.
But as I told the teacher, I have mercy, it's just for certain people... To which he said, "that may be the definition of not having mercy." Oh, mercy.
Let me explain - if you are going through a divorce, sorry, I can't help you. If you have just been diagnosed with a strange foot disease, I really don't want to talk about it with you. If your brother's mother-in-law's second cousin was just diagnosed with cancer, I would be lying if I said I would be praying for you. I just can't do it. And up until now, I have felt really, really guilty about that. Like I am an emotional defect. Why is it my hubs has his heart ripped out when he finds out a complete stranger has cancer and my response (inwardly at least) is usually very ho-hum? We've seen a very dear friend fight and die from cancer and as painful as it was to see her go through - she's dining with the creator of the universe right now while I'm eating shredded wheat - who's got it better now?
I know that all sounds very callous and heartless but as I said, I realized that while I don't have the gift of mercy - I think I'm pretty content that I scored when God was giving out the presents none-the-less.
I got the gift of prophecy. Which just sounds cool to me. In the description, it listed those people as "strong convictions and expects others to as well; need to express herself verbally, especially regarding right and wrong; painfully direct when correcting others; persistent in expressing feelings regarding need for change; ability to proclaim God's truth without compromise." Oh honey, if you looked my name up in the dictionary - that might just be the definition! Big mouth, big heart, but also big attitude about telling you about it.
So while I may not be the one to be visiting rest homes weekly or baking casseroles for widowed spouses, I am pretty passionate about showing mercy to those little ones who are so often overlooked. And the way I figure it, since God is perfect, and His plan is perfect, He must think it is perfectly alright that He made me this way. Cause He's got those areas already covered and needs me for other things, right?
So what gift did our Daddy give you?
And while we are in the mood to confess (or me anyway) - after a Sunday School lesson this past week, I need to confess to all my peeps - I have no mercy. Or very little. It's sad really. Feel free to stop following me at this point.
We did a spiritual gifts survey to which my score in the mercy column, let's just say, it's less than the number of fingers I have. Almost on one hand. As a Compassion advocate, I should probably be fired.
But as I told the teacher, I have mercy, it's just for certain people... To which he said, "that may be the definition of not having mercy." Oh, mercy.
Let me explain - if you are going through a divorce, sorry, I can't help you. If you have just been diagnosed with a strange foot disease, I really don't want to talk about it with you. If your brother's mother-in-law's second cousin was just diagnosed with cancer, I would be lying if I said I would be praying for you. I just can't do it. And up until now, I have felt really, really guilty about that. Like I am an emotional defect. Why is it my hubs has his heart ripped out when he finds out a complete stranger has cancer and my response (inwardly at least) is usually very ho-hum? We've seen a very dear friend fight and die from cancer and as painful as it was to see her go through - she's dining with the creator of the universe right now while I'm eating shredded wheat - who's got it better now?
I know that all sounds very callous and heartless but as I said, I realized that while I don't have the gift of mercy - I think I'm pretty content that I scored when God was giving out the presents none-the-less.
I got the gift of prophecy. Which just sounds cool to me. In the description, it listed those people as "strong convictions and expects others to as well; need to express herself verbally, especially regarding right and wrong; painfully direct when correcting others; persistent in expressing feelings regarding need for change; ability to proclaim God's truth without compromise." Oh honey, if you looked my name up in the dictionary - that might just be the definition! Big mouth, big heart, but also big attitude about telling you about it.
So while I may not be the one to be visiting rest homes weekly or baking casseroles for widowed spouses, I am pretty passionate about showing mercy to those little ones who are so often overlooked. And the way I figure it, since God is perfect, and His plan is perfect, He must think it is perfectly alright that He made me this way. Cause He's got those areas already covered and needs me for other things, right?
So what gift did our Daddy give you?
Monday, February 22, 2010
Dangerous Cauliflower
I realize I haven't updated in a week ... really? It's not cause I have nothing to say - anyone who knows me could tell you that. (I have permanent diarrhea of the mouth. )
Just a quick update since I'm procrastinating from going out to work after a week off. A week off with a feverish little one. Who for some reason hasn't realized yet that she isn't sick and that whiney voice, that's just not so cool anymore.
And while I'm on the topic of sick young-uns: At 1:00 am Friday night we were giving Braeden a bath and spraying off his sheets - outside - as the stench of vomit permeated the entire house. Braeden sleeps on the top bunk. Yeah us. At least it was only 24 hours, and even better, hasn't spread to the rest of the household.
-------------------------------------------------------
Our homestudy is oh, oh so close, to being finished. The social worker wrote last Thursday to let us know that she is back to the grind. Appears that while cutting up a cauliflower, she sliced her pointer finger open to the point of needing stitches and hasn't been able to type. The stitches just came out so now we're back on as she had been 'hunting and pecking' for two weeks on our report!
Let me take this opportunity to mention. I love veggies. Spinach, broccoli, peas, corn, tomatoes. I have a love affair with mushrooms. I am an addict. But I hate some cauliflower. And now I hate it even more...
Just a quick update since I'm procrastinating from going out to work after a week off. A week off with a feverish little one. Who for some reason hasn't realized yet that she isn't sick and that whiney voice, that's just not so cool anymore.
And while I'm on the topic of sick young-uns: At 1:00 am Friday night we were giving Braeden a bath and spraying off his sheets - outside - as the stench of vomit permeated the entire house. Braeden sleeps on the top bunk. Yeah us. At least it was only 24 hours, and even better, hasn't spread to the rest of the household.
-------------------------------------------------------
Our homestudy is oh, oh so close, to being finished. The social worker wrote last Thursday to let us know that she is back to the grind. Appears that while cutting up a cauliflower, she sliced her pointer finger open to the point of needing stitches and hasn't been able to type. The stitches just came out so now we're back on as she had been 'hunting and pecking' for two weeks on our report!
Let me take this opportunity to mention. I love veggies. Spinach, broccoli, peas, corn, tomatoes. I have a love affair with mushrooms. I am an addict. But I hate some cauliflower. And now I hate it even more...
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Too Small to Ignore
Dr. Wess Stafford is the President of Compassion International and I have been reading his book Too Small to Ignore. Where I thought the complimentary book would be a mini infomercial, it has instead turned into a really, really good read. Def. worth buying if I hadn't have gotten it free!
In addition to accounts of his childhood in the jungles of Africa and a missionary boarding school - in one of his chapters he describes the good, warm, touchy-feeley story of Jesus and the children. And this picture took on a whole new light that I never would have seen before:
Just in case you didn't realize - the story of Jesus telling the children to "come to me" is told in 3 Gospels - Matthew, Mark, and Luke. The setting - Jesus is talking to the religious leaders and his disciples about the legality of divorce and marriage.
In the Gospels, the Greek translation describes the children as "babes" with the same word used in "a babe in swaddling clothes" and also as paidion which means young children. So these were probably children age 6 and under, all cooing, gooing, and waving at our Lord.
So in the middle of this adult conversation where children should be seen and not heard, the little ones must have been getting a little rowdy and the disciples started to chastise. And here is where the story begins to take on a new light:
Do you realize that in Mark 10:14, Mark says that when the little children were pushed aside, Jesus, the creator of the universe, was indignant. Indignant: "angered at something unjust or wrong."
So Jesus got mad.. he didn't just lovingly say, "oh no.... let them come to me for just a moment" as the above painting suggests. He got angry. Could you have just seen him, raising his voice at the disciples, perhaps even yelling, "Let the little children come to me!! Don't you DARE hinder them! My kingdom belongs to such as these!" This instance must have made a large enough impact for 3 of the Gospel writers to include it in their synopsis of His ministry. Enough to stand out as an important moment within a life-time of miracles, parables, and wisdom.
What I also didn't realize until pointed out by Dr. Stafford: How often does the scriptures note that Jesus got mad, really furious, and showed it??
1) when the religious leaders were trying to dare Jesus not to heal the man with the withered hand on the Sabbath
2) this incident with the young children
3) in the Jerusalem temple overrun by corruption and consumerism
And, as we know from scripture, in those times, the cripple, as the man was, would have also been most likely a beggar in abject poverty. So who again, did Jesus get passionately angry on account of??
The poor.
The children.
His church.
NOT:
Prostitution
Homosexuality
Thievery
Murder
Tithing
Dr. Stafford also points out, as I stated previously, children were not valued in that society. Their purpose was to be "seen and not heard." But how often now, are the world's children "not seen AND not heard." Where are our priorities and would Jesus be indignant about them? Where does the church of today rank in modeling itself after Jesus' values? Are we doing a good job taking up where He left off and working to fight for those he would have fought for? Just something to make you think...
In addition to accounts of his childhood in the jungles of Africa and a missionary boarding school - in one of his chapters he describes the good, warm, touchy-feeley story of Jesus and the children. And this picture took on a whole new light that I never would have seen before:
Just in case you didn't realize - the story of Jesus telling the children to "come to me" is told in 3 Gospels - Matthew, Mark, and Luke. The setting - Jesus is talking to the religious leaders and his disciples about the legality of divorce and marriage.
In the Gospels, the Greek translation describes the children as "babes" with the same word used in "a babe in swaddling clothes" and also as paidion which means young children. So these were probably children age 6 and under, all cooing, gooing, and waving at our Lord.
So in the middle of this adult conversation where children should be seen and not heard, the little ones must have been getting a little rowdy and the disciples started to chastise. And here is where the story begins to take on a new light:
Do you realize that in Mark 10:14, Mark says that when the little children were pushed aside, Jesus, the creator of the universe, was indignant. Indignant: "angered at something unjust or wrong."
So Jesus got mad.. he didn't just lovingly say, "oh no.... let them come to me for just a moment" as the above painting suggests. He got angry. Could you have just seen him, raising his voice at the disciples, perhaps even yelling, "Let the little children come to me!! Don't you DARE hinder them! My kingdom belongs to such as these!" This instance must have made a large enough impact for 3 of the Gospel writers to include it in their synopsis of His ministry. Enough to stand out as an important moment within a life-time of miracles, parables, and wisdom.
What I also didn't realize until pointed out by Dr. Stafford: How often does the scriptures note that Jesus got mad, really furious, and showed it??
1) when the religious leaders were trying to dare Jesus not to heal the man with the withered hand on the Sabbath
2) this incident with the young children
3) in the Jerusalem temple overrun by corruption and consumerism
And, as we know from scripture, in those times, the cripple, as the man was, would have also been most likely a beggar in abject poverty. So who again, did Jesus get passionately angry on account of??
The poor.
The children.
His church.
NOT:
Prostitution
Homosexuality
Thievery
Murder
Tithing
Dr. Stafford also points out, as I stated previously, children were not valued in that society. Their purpose was to be "seen and not heard." But how often now, are the world's children "not seen AND not heard." Where are our priorities and would Jesus be indignant about them? Where does the church of today rank in modeling itself after Jesus' values? Are we doing a good job taking up where He left off and working to fight for those he would have fought for? Just something to make you think...
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Adoption Update
The house is officially off the market.
Which is good - we love our house. The kids love our house. A big 'whoop' went up when we told them we weren't moving. (truth be told, I think the neighborhood kiddos had been praying super hard the house wouldn't sell!)
Which is also disappointing - it puts us back at square one. All along, I didn't want this adoption to be about us. And still don't. Not only do I want that little girl safe and healthy in her own bed where she belongs - but my prayer all along has been for this adoption to be a huge testament to those around us that God is still at work in this world. That prayers are answered. That He has big plans and we get to be a part of those if we take that step and say "I will".
We knew that if we kept the house on the market for long-term, and kept adjusting the price to try to sell it - that would not be God moving, but US moving with the market. Trying to do things on our own merit vs. letting the miracles and blessings fall where they may.
So - we are taking things step by step and letting God shine his light on the next step of the path we should take, and the next, and so on.
-----------------------------------------------
So - we just finished our homestudy visits about a week and a half ago. And after our social worker, (who now has a broke finger unfortunately), gets it typed up - it has to be verified by us + a bunch of people before we can send it down to Charleston and wait for permission to adopt an orphan. So the paperwork process is almost, getting closer, to being finished.
So - now we are just praying for that next step to be shown. A fundraiser in the mix. A huge commission sale for Tony. A distant relative leaving an inheritance. A win on a game show .....
As I mentioned before, I can't change the amount given on my chip-in slider but I can change the amount requested. So the $15,500 needed has moved down to $15,000 as some super, loving, awesome friends of ours - that rock both literally and as friends, have chipped in to help bring Olivia home. Thank you guys!!!!! We are now at needing $5400 to submit our dossier and get on the waiting list for a baby girl. And I'm not stressing cause I know HE's got it covered. (Not stressing till due date anyway..... then ask me how my faith is holding up!)
Hebrews 11:1 "Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see."
Which is good - we love our house. The kids love our house. A big 'whoop' went up when we told them we weren't moving. (truth be told, I think the neighborhood kiddos had been praying super hard the house wouldn't sell!)
Which is also disappointing - it puts us back at square one. All along, I didn't want this adoption to be about us. And still don't. Not only do I want that little girl safe and healthy in her own bed where she belongs - but my prayer all along has been for this adoption to be a huge testament to those around us that God is still at work in this world. That prayers are answered. That He has big plans and we get to be a part of those if we take that step and say "I will".
We knew that if we kept the house on the market for long-term, and kept adjusting the price to try to sell it - that would not be God moving, but US moving with the market. Trying to do things on our own merit vs. letting the miracles and blessings fall where they may.
So - we are taking things step by step and letting God shine his light on the next step of the path we should take, and the next, and so on.
-----------------------------------------------
So - we just finished our homestudy visits about a week and a half ago. And after our social worker, (who now has a broke finger unfortunately), gets it typed up - it has to be verified by us + a bunch of people before we can send it down to Charleston and wait for permission to adopt an orphan. So the paperwork process is almost, getting closer, to being finished.
So - now we are just praying for that next step to be shown. A fundraiser in the mix. A huge commission sale for Tony. A distant relative leaving an inheritance. A win on a game show .....
As I mentioned before, I can't change the amount given on my chip-in slider but I can change the amount requested. So the $15,500 needed has moved down to $15,000 as some super, loving, awesome friends of ours - that rock both literally and as friends, have chipped in to help bring Olivia home. Thank you guys!!!!! We are now at needing $5400 to submit our dossier and get on the waiting list for a baby girl. And I'm not stressing cause I know HE's got it covered. (Not stressing till due date anyway..... then ask me how my faith is holding up!)
Hebrews 11:1 "Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see."
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